Beer Pouch Hoodie Sweatshirt
The Third Hand You’ve Always Wanted
Ok I admit, it looks pretty silly. You probably are thinking “I don’t need this. If I need to put down my drink to use my other hand, I’ll just put it down.” Yes, you can do this, but do you really want to risk it? This is what could happen if you don’t have the Beer Pouch Hoodie Sweatshirt.
Risks of Not Owning the Beer Pouch Sweatshirt:
- Someone will knock over your drink
- You will knock over your drink
- An animal will knock over your drink
- An earthquake will knock over your drink
- Someone will drug or poison your drink and then murder, rape, or burn you alive
Are the risks of not owning the shirt worth it? I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to go out of this world being burned alive. So what is the shirt good for?
Benefits of the Beer Pouch Sweatshirt:
- Great for standing up/eating events: bbq’s, house parties, hiking, etc…
- Conversation starter and ice breaker (indirect way to pick up chicks)
- Perfect for needy girlfriends/boyfriends who always want you to hold their drink
- Prevents people from slipping a roofie into your drink
If that doesn’t convince you maybe this video will:
Some common questions/concerns:
- Won’t I get wet by sticking my drink there? No, not only is the beer pouch lined with nylon to keep you dry, it also keeps your drink cool.
- That’s great and all, but I don’t drink beer. Don’t drink beer? What’s wrong with you? Well, that’s fine. The beer pouch can hold all kinds of beverages thanks to its nifty elastic band. So you can go back and drink your “Mike’s Hard Lemonade.”
- It’s kind of ugly, people will laugh at me. True, it’s not Abercrombie and Fitch, but the benefits outweigh the fashion. When they spill their drink, you will have the last laugh. Wear the sweartshirt with these barefoot shoes and you’ll truly be dressed to impress.
FuncFash-ness: 6.5/10
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Functional: 4/5 (your own personal cupholder where ever you go)
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Fashionable: 2.5/5 ( look pregnant or be mistaken for a kangaroo)
Where to Buy:
- Vat19: Beer Pouch Sweatshirt $35.95 (last update 7-24-009)
Features:
- Nylon insulated pouch with strong elastic band
- 90% cotton / 10% polyester
- Pouch is 5.5″ x 6″
- Comes in Medium, Large, Extra Large (no women’s sizes yet)
UPDATE:
I found a homemade “DIY” workaround for women who wish to have their own version of the Beer Pouch Sweatshirt. Click the photo below (word of caution it’s NSFW). Enjoy.
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