They are in order of who could have used bullet proof clothes the least to the greatest (all could have used it, but some could have used it more than others).

10.   Akon – Shot 1 Time

2004 New Jersey – Was shot in the shoulder during a drive-by shooting incident that also killed his manager Robert Montanez.  Akon then put on his pair of Ice Creams and made a full recovery.

9.  Fabolous – Shot 1 Time

2006 New York - Shot in the right leg leaving a restaurant with his entourage.  Rumor has it it was over a woman.  Instead of waiting for the police he and his crew fled away and got pulled over for running a red light.  They were then arrested for possessing unlicensed firearms.  He vowed never to get caught up in drama because of “his bikini clad hoes“.

8.  Obie Trice – Shot 2 Times

2005 Detroit – Shot twice while driving on a Detriot freeway.  After the shooting he managed to pull off the highway and his girlfriend who was riding with him at the time was able to call for help.  One of the bullets is still lodged in his head.

7.  Lloyd Banks – Shot 2 Times

2001 New York - Shot in the abdomen twice with one bullet tearing through his liver.  Amazingly, he ran himself to the hospital, got hit by a car, and woke up in the hospital with the nurses screaming “The buildings fell!”  It was September 11, 2001.

6.  Cam’ron – Shot 3 Times

2005 Washington D.C. – While stopped at a light in his Lamborghini a would-be carjacker try to jack his car, but Cam’ron refused an got shot 3 times in the arms (while holding the steering wheel).  The carjacker fled away and Cam’ron drove aimlessly around until a fan found him and took him to the hospital.  Notable quote:  “They didn’t get anything…I still got my car and my jewelry.”

5.  Ol’Dirty Bastard – Shot 3 Times

1994 New York -Shot in the abdomen after an argument with another rapper.  1998 New York - Shot in the back and the arm after a home robbery attempt at his girlfriend’s house, but survived.  What ultimately killed him was a drug overdose in 2004.

4.  Notorious BIG – Shot 4 Times

1997 Los Angeles – Shot 4 times in the chest and killed after leaving a party in Los Angeles.  The killer was reportedly wearing a blue suit and bow tie.

3.  The Game – Shot 5 Times

2001 Los Angeles – Shot 5 times when he was 18 during a failed drug deal.  Places he was shot includes heart, stomach, arms, and legs.  After his coma he checked himself out of the hostpital and decided to get serious about rapping.

2.  50 Cent – Shot 9 Times

2000 New York – Shot 9 times including his hand, arm, hip, both legs, chest and left cheek during a robbery attempt.  A robber told him to give him the jewelry from his house, but instead 50 Cent went to his car.  50 Cent now wears a bullet proof vest when he goes out in public.  He was supposedly shot by a white man, that’s why he is still currently a self proclaimed racist that uses black toilet paper to wipe his ass.

1.  Tupac – Shot 9 Times

1994 New York – Shot 5 times in the lobby of a recording studio: twice in the head, twice in the groin, and once through the arm and thigh.  This did not kill him as he checked himself out of the hospital 3 hours after he underwent surgery to make a court appearance.  1996 Las Vegas - Shot 4 times in a drive-by shooting.  He was shot in the chest, pelvis, right hand, and thigh.  He died 6 days later.

If reading this list got you paranoid about getting shot, made money hustling on the streets already…then BUY ONE NOW..otherwise check out the original store. caballero apparel.

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1. Miguel Caballero: High End Bullet Proof Fashion

Imagine this scene.  Two men at an expensive cocktail party.

Man 1: “That’s an interesting jacket, who are you wearing?”

Man 2: “Miguel Caballero…”

Man 1: “Miguel…hmm, haven’t heard of him. Anyway, I’m wearing Giorgio, as in Giorgio ARMANI.”

Man 2: “That’s nice, my jacket is BULLETPROOF.”

Man 1: [silence...lowers head and walks away]

Miguel Caballero is a designer of high end bullet proof clothing.  While other higher profile designers like Hugo Boss, Versace, Dolce are dressing up celebrities to show off on the red carpet, Miguel is dressing up civilians and law enforcement to save lives on the streets of Columbia.  The same Columbia which has the 3rd highest intentional homocide rate in the world at 33 homicides per 100,000 inhabitants (the United State’s rate is 5 per 100k).  Miguel’s clothing saves lives, while Versace’s clothing helps Shia LeBouf score chicks.  Nothing wrong with that of course, just different.  Now Miguel Caballero is bringing his line of popular bullet proof clothing to the the mean streets of the United States.

Is this a Gimmick?  Does it really block bullets?

I was skeptical until I watched this video of a guy signing his life away to be shot at point blank range with a .38 caliber pistol.  What’s even cooler is that if you live you get a cool t-shirt.

So it blocks pistol bullets, I have bigger UZI problems…

What’s interesting about the Caballero line of clothing is that not only do use choose the size of clothes that you want, but you also choose the level or protection you would like.  No different than choosing the level of spiciness you want at Thai Cafe.

Level 1:  Low Protection

This is the lowest amount of protection you can get, but even at this level you are still protected from .357, .38, or 9mm caliber pistol weapons.

Level 2: Medium Protection

One step above level one adds protection from Mini UZI’s, sub-machine guns, and 12 gauge shotguns.  Not a bad upgrade!

Level 3:  High Protection

The highest level of protection offered by Cabellero gives you all the benefits of the previous levels plus you get protection from bigger automatic weapons like the MP-5, which for anyone who plays Counterstrike knows can be quite deadly.  Oh at this level you are also STAB proof.

What kind of clothes and what do they look like?

They have various styles of clothes and even different collections.  The 4 collections are Black, Gold, Classic, and Silver.  Classic and Silver Collections are for military and law enforcement.    Black and Gold Collection are more for civilians like you and me.

The Black Collection states that it’s “European style clothing designed exclusively for the client seeking stylish yet camouflaged bulletproof options.”

The Gold Collection is more casual and  “developed for clients who engage in a variety of activities.”

How does it work?

They use two layers of fabric and in between they put in their lightweight anti-ballistic panels that keep you safe from bullet harm.  These panels are removable as well.  Depending on what level protection you want they place different types of panels in to the clothing.  Thanks to these panels you also get the added benefits of being both waterproof and fireproof (though I wouldn’t recommend testing out the fireproof claim).

Alright, I want it. How much does Caballero cost?

Unfortunately safety doesn’t come cheap, that’s why people like Obama and other VIP’s get these type of clothes.  Depending on what you get prices range from $1700 and up.  In the end it depends on how much you value your life.

Let’s compare a Caballero product vs a traditional high end designer product:

Caballero Tropical Shirt with level 2 Protection $1,699

A nice breathable button down short sleeves shirt that you could happily wear while strolling down Central Park on a nice summer’s day.  Also saves your life by stopping 9mm bullets.

Versace Sleeveless T-Shirt $3500

A rare sleeveless Versace panther t-shirt with Swarovski crystals embedded.  Apparently the same style shirt that N-sync wore on their 2001 tour.  Does not stop bullets. Luckily, no one opened fire on Nsync…

Conclusion:

The Miguel Caballero line of bullet proof clothing is pretty darn cool.  Unfortunately wearing it will add some weight to you and it’s pretty expensive.  However, if you get the top of the line defense level this will make you impervious to bullets, fire, and stabbings.  I know Armani for sure doesn’t give me this kind of peace of mind.  If it’s good enough for Steven Seagal (seen here wearing Caballero standing next to Cabellero) then it’s good enough for me.  Now I know why Seagal never dies in his movies and why he is so Hard to Kill.

FuncFash-ness:  9/10

• Functional: 5/5 (it’s clothes that saves your life, good for war torn areas or American slums)
• Fashionable: 4/5 (you can’t even tell how invincible you are when wearing this)

Where to Buy:

• Security USA Pro:  Caballero various styles and defense levels $1700 and up

Features:

• Thermal regulation technology, keeps you body’s temperature cool as you wear
• Garments weigh from 1.kg to 1.8 kg (2.2 lbs to 4 lbs)
• Removable panels for easy cleaning
• Impact distribution system that limits trauma and pain inflicted when shot

**UPDATE**

I found a video done by “Behind the Seams” profiling Caballero and his bullet proof clothing operation down in Columbia.  Very interesting and worth checking out (to watch hover over the black area, click pause, click play…it’s weird):

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1. 10 Rappers That Should Have Worn Caballero
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3. FuncFash Recap (Week of 7-27-09)