NoRiders New Marketing Strategy by FuncFash

Armanstein — Wed, 29 Jul 2009 19:36:02 +0000

NoRiders is the revolutionary product that we recently featured that prevents shorts from riding up your legs into your crotch. While some people might find short crotch bunching stylish, most people like to avoid it. Surprisingly not many people are aware of this game changing product. While their official product video is informative we at FuncFash think it’s lacking that “je ne se qua” (magical quality) that’s stopping NoRiders from making a boatload of money. We took it upon ourselves to figure out how we could improve their marketing and image. Here’s our answer.

Background:

We started by asking a question. What can NoRiders do to improve brand recognition and brainwash people into leaving what they are doing at this very moment to go out and purchase all he NoRiders they can? Here’s what we know will help:

Target a younger demographic. Young people love watching videos online . After being targeted they will tell their parents about this wonderful product
Need a better name than “NoRiders.” An urban hip name, like “NoRida’s” (pronounced no-rye-duhs) is better. Kids love gangsta’ lingo
Spokesperson that influences young people. Vitamin Water has done well by choosing Fiddy Cent, so we want rap sensation FloRida (pronounced flo-rye-duh and not to be confused with Florida, the Sunshine state)

New slogan like “NoRida’s by FloRida.” This will lead to increased sales revenue guaranteed.

What do you think? Is the new video better than the old video? (original video below)

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NoRiders Stops Crotch Bunching Syndrome. Period

Armanstein — Thu, 23 Jul 2009 21:51:27 +0000

Sometimes there comes along a product so awesome revolutionary that it really needs no introduction. I present to you NoRiders® from ProductMasters, Inc. NoRiders are fabric strips you iron-on attach to the inside of your shorts to prevent them from riding up into your crotch and having people point and laugh at you. Their introduction video explains it all.

How NoRiders Can Help You:

1) Identify if you have Crotch Bunching Syndrome (CBS). If you and your shorts look anything like the picture than you definitely have CBS and should seek help.

2) Go to NoRiders.com and purchase a set of either Iron-on patches or Inseam stays. You are now one step closer to curing CBS.

3) Go home and attach NoRiders to every pair of shorts you own. Don’t worry. It’s easy.

4) Now you can go out in public again. You are cured of cured of Crotch Bunching Syndrome

Observations About Crotch Bunching Syndrome:

Seems only to affect the older more portly population
Men and women are equally affected (though women slightly more)
White people are more susceptible

FuncFash-ness: 5/10 + 10/10 (Awesome-ness)

Functional: 3/5 (while CBS is serious, not sure if it’s a widespread problem)
Fashionable: 2/5 (you probably won’t go around showing off your NoRiders)
Awesome-ness: 10/10 (it’s like the Snuggie but better)

Note: There is a poll embedded within this post, please visit the site to participate in this post's poll.

Where to Buy:

NoRiders.com: Thin Cotton Iron-on Patches (for light fabric) $3.99 – $19.99, Twill Cotton Iron-on Patches (for heavy fabric) $3.59 – $20.99. Inseam Stays (various styles) $2.59 – $24.99.

Features:

Rather than talk about the features, I’ll just share some quotes from what ProductMasters says about NoRiders.

“Stop the annoyance and embarrassment of shorts that ride up your inner thighs”
“NoRiders enhance the appearance of shorts and make them a pleasure to wear.”
“…START the enjoyment of wearing shorts again. Put shorts back in their place!”

FuncFash » NoRiders